Parsha Review Podcast · Rabbi Aryeh Wolbe

00:12 - Rabbi Aryeh Wolbe (Host)
All right, welcome back, everybody, welcome back. It is so awesome to see everyone here this beautiful Thursday morning. This week's parashas, parashas vayishlach and what a special parashah. It is. So many lessons to learn and I'm really excited. So let's jump right in.

00:27
Parashas vayishlach is the eighth portion in the book of Genesis, the eighth portion since the beginning of the Torah. We have 154 verses, 1,976 words and 7,485 letters. There is one mitzvah in this parashah. It's a prohibition, and it's the prohibition from eating the sciatic nerve, the t-bone, because, as we'll see, yaakov got into a fight with the angel of Asav and as a I don't know we don't know the reasons for the commandments, but this is one of the commandments that God tells us right after the story, probably as a remembrance for this battle that we are constantly fighting against the angels of Asav, that we don't eat that part of an animal. Okay, so the story begins in this week's parashah how Yaakov was returning to the holy land, and Yaakov sends angels with a message of peace to a peace's brother After stealing the first born blessings, but he didn't really steal. And we write stealing, but it's not really stealing. What Yaakov is doing is he realizes his brother's upset about this trade that they had, and he's not sure that Asav's not wanting to kill him. Still so, even though 20 years have passed, he is still concerned about his brother. The messengers return, reporting that Asav is approaching with an army of 400 men and Yaakov now is afraid because Asav is a lot stronger than him. Asav is a violent guy and Yaakov is a guy who speaks words, and that's what how Isaac defined the difference between the two was that the hands are the hands of Asav, but the voice is the voice of Jacob. So Yaakov is worried and does three things. Number one is he prepares gifts for his brother. Number two is he prays. And number three is he strategically prepares for war.

02:25
Then we have the struggle. That night, yaakov helps his family and animals cross the Yabok River, then he stays behind. Yaakov meets the angel of Asav and they wrestle all night long until dawn, ad alos, asahar, till the morning arises. They were fighting, they were battling, they were struggling. Yaakov emerges victorious but is left with an injured sinew in his thigh and, very interestingly, our sages teach us that this struggle is a struggle that each one of us face. Each one of us have that same struggle. Yaakov represents Israel, the Jewish people. The angel gives Jacob that name of Yisra'el after this struggle, because this is not a struggle just of Yaakov, this is a struggle of the entire Jewish people, for the entire history. We're going to have this struggle. The angel foretells that he will be named Yisra'el, signifying Yaakov's victory, and he blesses him. And then there's the meeting. The morning Yaakov and Asav meet, they hug, they kiss, they cry and they reconcile. Asav thanks Yaakov for his gift and tries rejecting them, but Yaakov insists and Asav keeps it. We'll see soon. Very interesting If we look at the words.

03:48
Remember, we said we say this every week. There's not an extra word, there's not an extra letter, there's not an extra verse. You'll see that even one word, one letter teaches us so much wisdom, so much wisdom in every single word. Yaakov, still fearful of his brother, rejects Asav's offer that they dwelt together in Seir, excusing it for the long travel time, for the women and children and all the animals. Don't forget Yaakov amassed a tremendous amount of wealth when he was by his father-in-law, laban, and he got all these sheep and more sheep, and more sheep, and he became extremely, extremely wealthy. And that he'll come at a later date.

04:33
Yaakov does not end up going to Seir but rather travels to Sukkos and then to Shchem. And then comes the story of Shchem. Shchem the prince of ducts and violates Dina, yaakov's daughter, in an attempt to marry Dina. The prince and his father suggest a treaty between the parties that the Jews can marry the Shchemites and the Shchemites can marry the Jews and will just be one family and kumbaya, and everything will just be great. Yaakov sons, shem and Levi trick Shchem and company with a fake agreement and stipulate the agreement to all the males of Shchem undergoing a brismila, a circumcision. Shem and Levi execute all the males who were weakened by the circumcision, which is on the third day. You're the weakest after circumcision, and that's when they obliterate, annihilate and destroy the entire city. They justify this action by the city's tacit complicity in the abduction of their sister. Yaakov is very unhappy with their actions and we'll see in a few minutes in the important lessons that we need to learn from this week's Parashah. We'll see what exactly Yaakov reprimanded them for.

05:51
The three important people pass away. Number one is Hashem commands Yaakov to go to base A'el Bethel and build an altar. Devora, rivka's nurse, dies. It doesn't explicitly tell us in the Torah that Rivka died, and the reason is because our sages tell us it's so beautiful that if it would be announced that Rivka died, if it wasn't done quietly and she was buried at night, then Asav would come and then people would curse Rivka, look at the son you brought to this world so quietly. They buried Rivka Again. It wasn't out in the open, and just like it wasn't out in the open then it isn't out in the open in the Torah, hashem appears to Yaakov. Hashem blesses him and changes his name to Yisrael. While traveling to Hebron, rachel gives birth to Binyamin and dies in childbirth. Rachel is buried on Bethlehem Drive, on the way Derech, bethlehem, and Yaakov builds a monument on Rachel's resting place, which stands till today Rachel's tomb. We'll see something very special about that incredible place in a minute. Yaakov arrives in Hebron, yitzchak passes away at 180, at 180 years old, and is buried by his sons.

07:13
The Torah portion concludes by listing Asav's descendants and, as we see many times, the Torah leaves off the portion with just the final details. Let's just, we got to get it out of the way and we saw that by Yishmael with the last, his descendants were also at the end of the parshah. We have Asav now. His descendants are just at the end of the parshah. We have to put it in, obviously, but it's not a very strong emphasis. Why? Because the Torah only emphasizes, the Torah only focuses on those that were righteous, those that did the will of Hashem, those that represented godliness in this world. Okay, so now let's turn to the important lessons, some of the important lessons that we can hopefully glean and derive from this week's Torah portion.

07:59
Yaakov wasn't influenced by Loven. It says Loven, garti, garti. I lived with Loven. The word Garti, rashi tells us, is the same numeric, the same letters as Tarjag, tarjag, the 613 commandments. What Yaakov is demonstrating here is that I lived with a no-good-neck, I lived with a guy who wasn't good. I lived with Loven, with Laban, but I didn't learn from his ways. I didn't learn from trouble, I stayed away from his bad ways. And it was a fantastic demonstration of how, even if someone is in a bad environment, if someone has negative influences, if a person really works hard and focuses and pays attention to stay away from harm, to stay away from the bad influence, they can succeed, just like Jacob did.

08:55
Now our say-just-tell us, and we'll see soon, that Yaakov didn't live with Asav. Why, he says I don't know. Now there's a difference between what Yaakov did. Yaakov was alone, he was a single individual versus with his children. Your children are much easier influenced and therefore we must protect our children. We must protect our children from influences, and if we think that our children won't be influenced by a negative environment, we're terribly mistaken. So if our children are in a school, if they're in a neighborhood that has a negative environment, it's our job as parents to get them out of there. Okay, the next lesson is that Yaakov prepares to meet Asav. He has a war plan prayer and gifts, our say-just-tell us.

09:45
The most powerful of all of those preparations was prayer. Prayer has the ability to remove all threat, to remove all harm, to remove everything. Prayer is so powerful, it transforms the reality in front of us. It says Even if a very sharp blade, a sword, is right on your throat to kill you, don't consider yourself distant from mercy. Pray, utilize the opportunity to pray.

10:27
We see the fight with the angel till the dawn. This is the eternal struggle till the end of time. It's the dawn, it's in the night, meaning we're in exile. Nighttime is exile. It's when we don't have clarity, till when, till dawn. What's dawn? What happens at dawn. Suddenly, there's light. What's that light? It's the light of Mashiach, the coming of the Messiah.

10:51
When Mashiach comes, we'll suddenly look back and realize what the struggle was. We'll understand all of these world events, all of these tragedies that befell the Jewish people. We'll understand it then because we'll have the light Right now, even though it seems like things are going great. Look at, jews are prospering and Jews are amassing tremendous wealth and so successful in so many different areas, but we're still in darkness. The reality that we have today of anti-Semitism on a rise is just a reminder. We're not free people. We're still in exile. We have darkness that we're dealing with. We need to bring that light and, like I love saying at this time of the year, chanukah is the time to shine that light to the world, to be proud of our Judaism, to be proud of who we are as a people, and not to shy away from it. Don't run away from it, Enjoy it, shine the light with the world, sheer it so who is really happy? This is one of the greatest insights.

12:06
If you look in this week's Torah portion, you look at Yaakov and Asav referring in chapter 33, verse 9 and verse 11. And if you look at verse 9, you'll see Yaakov says v'chieh shlikol, I've got it all. Two verses later, what does Asav say? Yaishly rav, I have a lot. What's the difference between I have it all and I have a lot? When I say I have it all, that means I have nothing, that I'm missing, nothing, that I'm lacking. When I say I have a lot, I still want more. You're not satisfied. A person needs to go with the attitude of I have it all.

12:45
You know who said that? Abraham and Isaac and Jacob. That's why, in our grace, after we eat bread, we say the special Birkat Hamazon. We say three words Bakol Mikol Kol. Bakol was Abraham. Abraham and Hashem. Berachas. Avram Bakol Hashem blessed Abraham with all he had. It all Doesn't mean he had it all. I'm sure he didn't have hotels and motels, I'm sure he didn't have all of the Corvettes and the fancy watches, but he saw that Hashem gave him everything that he was supposed to have. And his perspective wasn't that I still need more. That's an Asaph perspective. I have a lot, I would love some more. No, I have it all. Isaac was the same thing and we see the same by Jacob. Bakol Mikol Kol. We ask Hashem, bless us with the same Bakol, mikol Kol, the all, all, all that Abraham Isaac and Jacob had. We don't say Mikheyeh lirav, I have a lot, just like Asaph, and it's such an important perspective for us to have.

13:56
You know that we're living in a generation that is dealing with a tremendous amount of anxiety, dealing with a tremendous amount of pain, but I don't understand. You know, the advertisement for the washing machine was like what are you going to do with all that time? And now people are like so oh, my goodness, I have so many things and we have today. We have technology at our fingertips that is greater than the technology that they had when they shot the space ship to the moon. We have more technology at our fingertips. We can talk to someone, we can video call someone across the globe, and yet we're not happier, we're more anxious. You know why.

14:43
It's one thing that's missing Gratitude. If we stopped every day and appreciated the good that we have. Like Jacob, you know what I have. I have it all. Exactly what God wanted me to have is what I have, and I'm grateful that I have the ability, you know, if we stopped every day to thank Hashem for our eyesight, if we stopped and thank Hashem for our ability to walk and our ability to talk and our ability to eat and our ability to hear music and our ability to just experience life, to breathe in and out oxygen. It's the most amazing thing in the world.

15:25
But instead of appreciating and giving thanks, what are we doing? What's the next thrill? What's the next thrill? What's the next thrill? I'm the Yash li-rav. I have a lot, but I still want more. I still want more. I have to change that perspective. I have to have a paradigm shift. Change it to the perspective of I'm grateful for it all. I'm thankful for it all. That is what the perspective of a Jew needs to be and that's what we learned from Abraham Isaac and Jacob to always be grateful and thank Hashem for that. We have it all Hashem has given us all.

16:01
So we see that the parting of ways from Asav is unique, because by Laban, who was a negative influence as well, we don't see that Yaakov left, but with Asav he leaves. So I think it's also telling, because now Yaakov had little children and he didn't want the children to be influenced in a negative way. So he needs to separate from Asav and it's a theme that we've mentioned a lot. We are the guardians, we are the gatekeepers of our influence, of our environment, and we need to protect ourselves, we need to put protective measures to ensure that we're not negatively influenced from others. So then we have the story of Dina, and Dina is a very interesting story.

16:48
If you look at the verse chapter 34, verse 1, you see how the Torah relates that Dina left Jacob's tent. When we leave the house of holiness, the house of spirituality, we're putting ourselves in danger. She left Jacob's tent, meaning she was, so she left what happens. Trouble comes your way. We have to be very careful. We have to create an environment in our homes that is wholesome, that is fulfilling, that is loving, that is caring, and that's what Jacob had in his house. But Dina, for whatever reason, she left Jacob's tent. She left what happens? She was abducted, she was raped and taken by Shechem, and our sages teach us the importance of ensuring that our children stay in our homes, keep that warmth in the home. And this is not in any way a God forbid, a criticism of Jacob, god forbid. Jacob was righteous, holy, our patriarch and a perfect, perfect. Our sages call him perfect, incredible person. Jacob was and he was the pinnacle of truth.

18:10
Okay, what is the argument of the people of Shchem? Their argument is they say come, join us, be like us, or that argument of love is love and just like. Ignore everything else, because everything goes. If you're in love, then it's just fine. And the myth that people try to sell themselves and their conscience about intermarriage and assimilation is that if we're like them, they're going to love us. And that is such a flawed argument.

18:42
If you look at our history, it is replete with this argument where people are saying you know what, if we just look like them, they're not going to hate us. If we earn money like them, they're not going to hate us. If we're just educated like them, they're not going to hate us. So here's the deal. If you look at history, when the Jews were at the top of the financial spectrum, they were hated because, look, they're stealing, they're managing all the banks, they own everything, the rich Jews. When the Jews were at the bottom of the financial spectrum, they look at them, leeches, we have to give them handouts. When the Jews were at the highest of the intelligentsia, they were hated. And when they were at the lowest of it, they were hated. Whenever we were in, whatever state we were in, we were hated. There was never a state where they said or a time where they said oh, let's just love them. We have to understand this is a law that is instilled into creation.

19:47
Asa of Sone es Yaakov. Asa hates Yaakov. There's nothing we can do about it. We shouldn't try to reconcile, because it's not going to happen ever. That doesn't mean that we're nasty to our neighbors, god forbid. Just the opposite. We need to be nice to them and we need to give even the halacha says to give charity to their causes so that they don't have extra hatred to us. Mishum eva, there shouldn't be extra hatred. Soften it, give it to their causes. Yeah, you can give it to their YMCA. I mean, we don't give it to their churches, we don't give it to idolatry, but we can give it to their causes so that we defend and protect ourselves from extra hatred.

20:42
It's very important for us to realize that our goal as Jews is not to be assimilated. Our job is to be unique. Our job is to stand out. That's our job. That's what they look to us for when we try to blend in. They're like no, you're not doing your job You're supposed to be. It's like imagine, you know there's a big talk this week. Aaron Judge Anybody familiar with Aaron Judge, the baseball player just signed an enormous contract with the New York Yankees for eight years.

21:18
Let's say he says you know, I'm just going to be like a regular, ordinary player. Hello, you're not supposed to be a regular, ordinary player. You're supposed to be unique. You're supposed to be special. You're supposed to be different. No, I just want to fit in, I want to be normal like everybody else. That's not your job, the Jews. That's not our job. It's not our job to just blend in. It's our job to go out and be the special, unique, shining example of what it means to be a Jew, to be a godly person. And the nations of the world look up to us when we're like that. They say, ah, this is the example. They are a light unto the nations. Now, the simulating we're trying to hide it is not a successful path.

22:10
So now Yaakov is rebuking his children. We see, at the end of this book of Genesis, yaakov gives all the blessings and to Shimon and Levi, he beats them, he reprimands them and gives them terrible, terrible, constructive criticism. What does he say In his reprimand of them, killing out the entire city of Shechem. He doesn't say why did you kill them? He says why did you use trickery? Yaakov, who is a man of truth, couldn't handle that. His children used a scheme, a trickery. That's not called for in the house of Yaakov. You want to kill him? Kill him. You want to wage war? Wage war. Don't use trickery. That's not the way we act. It's very interesting that reprimand from Yaakov to his children that we don't use trickery.

23:10
So Yaakov fulfills his promise of tithing and brings offerings in Bethel. He removes the idolatry. He changes his clothes. Sometimes we need to freshen ourselves completely, remove ourselves. We see this by Abraham. When Abraham had those three angels who came to eat at his house, what did Abraham do? He said stay here under the tree. I'm going to bring you water to wash your feet. Why? Because they had idolatry. They were bowing down to idols. He didn't want idolatry in his midst.

23:40
Yaakov, who was around with Asaph, he goes, he leaves Asaph. I've got to change my clothes. I have to remove the physical environment that's on me and just clean myself of it. It's almost like if you walk into a house that it was just on fire and you smell the smoke. It gets onto your clothes. What do you got to do when you get home? Change your clothes, because you smell like the negative smell of that charred, burnt house. The contrary is true as well. So you walk into a perfume shop. You smell like you have that aroma as well, which is in the positive way.

24:21
Okay, rachel's tomb. Rachel's tomb is the only place on planet earth that was created for prayer. Rachel says bury me, derich Beislechem, bury me on the way to Beislechem. Why? Because when the Jewish people are going to go to exile, they're going to pass from Jerusalem, they're going to go right past my grave site, and I want this to be a place where they can pray to the Almighty. Rachel's tomb is the most powerful place for prayer. It was created just for prayer. The western wall is very holy and we pray at holy places. We pray at the grave sites of righteous people, but this is a place that's not only of a righteous person, our matriarch Rachel. This is a place that is designated for prayer. It was created for prayer. We have to utilize that.

25:19
And the last is the reward for Kibbut Avain. Is that the reason Asav's descendants are listed was a reward for him honoring his father so beautifully, the one mitzvah that he fulfilled to perfection, asav, even though he was wicked in every other area of life, the one area that he perfected was Kibbut Avain, honoring his father and mother, and that was a reward and an appeasement for the selling of the firstborn. That the Torah lists his descendants in the end of the parasha. Here that he's listed. He's not a persona non grata, but he's actually listed here as part of our holy Torah. So, my dear friends, that concludes the weekly parasha review for parashasvayishlach, and have a magnificent Shabbos and I look forward to continuing next week.